Style Invitational Week 932: We'll call them your-mama jokes
Your mama’s butt’s so big, she’s a foot taller when she sits down.
This week we visit — for the first time in its own Invitational contest — one of the most venerable forms of humor, the beloved your-mama joke. (The Wikipedia entry comprehensively termed “maternal insult” cites examples dating back to Shakespeare: “Chiron: ‘Thou hast undone our mother.’ Aaron: ‘Villain, I have done thy mother.’ ”) Invite Loser Dion Black of Washington posted the joke above recently on Facebook in the genre’s classic street grammar (prompting Loser Anne Paris to suggest this contest); we’ll be using standard English as above. This week: Tell an original “your mama” insult joke. Utter uniqueness might be impossible, but let’s do our best to come up with something new. As we will from here on in, we’re limiting you to “only” 25 entries per person. (No, the rule does not concern sane people; however, a few people out there often send dozens of entries a week — one Loser once sent 750, prompting a memorable Empress Tanty.)
Winner gets the Inker, the official Style Invitational trophy. Second prize receives a pink lollipop with a real scorpion embedded in it — we’ll call it the I’m Gonna Get You Sucker. Plus a pack of Instant Dinosaurs — little pellets that, after soaking in water, spring up into spongy dino-objects. These were bought in a science museum (!) by Melissa Yorks.
A. Groundhog Day.Q. What was the sequel to “Groundhog Day”? (John O’Byrne, Dublin; Evan Hadley, Potomac, Md.)
Dumb and dumber: Honorable mentions
Dead Poets Society: What group has about the same annual income as the Live Poets Society? (Randy Lee, doing volunteer work in Kibwezi, Kenya)
Say Anything: As a TV pundit, if you can’t say anything nice, what do you do? (Kevin Dopart, Washington)
Winnie the Pooh: What did Mrs. Churchill shout to her husband as he stepped off the curb? (Philip Justus, Potomac, Md., a First Offender)
Cape Fear: What does the prospect of another Superman movie trigger? (Dixon Wragg, Santa Rosa, Calif.)
Return of the Jedi: What occurs the day after you receive a Yoda bobblehead for Christmas? (Bonnie Speary Devore, Gaithersburg, Md.
English Grammar Online - News
Invite Loser Dion Black of Washington posted the joke above recently on Facebook in the genre's classic street grammar (prompting Loser Anne Paris to suggest this contest); we'll be using standard English as above. This week: Tell an original “your
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